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One result of joint family living (living in a close community of relatives and neighbors, I prefer to place it in a wider circle than just the family, for the closeness extends to the people living next to you) is no youth rebellion. Still I believe there is deep conflict between Indian fathers and sons, but it does not often take the form of open-prolonged rebellion. Sons are too dependent on their families for economic and emotional reasons. In a joint family of mother, father and say four children and their families, maybe only the father and one son have a job. They support the rest. Many sons receive expensive college educations only to graduate with no prospect of a job, they might have to wait years before gaining a position, in the meantime completely dependent on their families. The son is forced to marry at an early age again trapping him within the family, for the son brings his wife to live in his father's house.

But the strongest reasons are probably emotional that being raised in such close community with others, one becomes emotionally dependent on them. You become incapable of independent action. The traditions of decades are weights that hold you down.

In the large cities the seeds of change are planted but with the continuing rising population many Indians still cling emotionally dependent, on the past.

One example of interdependency of family is the front door of the home. There are no outside locks, except when the whole family is out, which is rare, then the door is bolted and locked with a heavy padlock. But usually someone is always home. If a son is

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out late at night, he must knock repeatedly, finally waking his mother, who will come to open the door. All actions are interdependent on other members of the family.

May 20, 70 Wed.

from small notebook:

Advertisement in newspaper shows Indian young man in western style dress seated in chair looking over 4 or 5 snapshots of girls, in the background is a refrigerator. The text goes: "You've got to be a choosy man. After all a wife's for a life time. That's Ramesh for you. Never does a thing without checking on the pros and cons of it. He wants to get married by October, but he doesn't want to rush things. He has already seen four or five girls. Maybe he'll see a few more and then take a decision. But one decision he certainly has taken for and before his marriage, thoughtful man that he is, he has made his future bride's life a lot easier by buying an Allwyn Kinfridge for their home." The equating of a wife with a product is very accurate. A wife here, is still picked and examined like a manufactured piece of goods on the market.

Love is not considered in terms of marriage, the question does arise. yet Indians have a great yearning for romantic love. They jam popular Hindi movies, all of which revolve around sentimental love. The search and conflicts involved in finding one true love. Indians seem to spend their lives denying themselves the things they desire.

May 20, 70