Uncle Abe, or A Hit at the Times

Uncle Abe, or A Hit At The Times

In the town of Chicago as you know very well,
Lived a man who aspired in the White House to dwell,
A second class lawyer, with little to do,
With a very nice wife, and children a few.

Says he to his wife one morning so fine,
My friends think my person, and speeches sublime,
With a pair of black whiskers, and a full dress of black,
Oh the town of Chicago we’ll soon turn our back.

On the day of Election—he was in great glee,
He invited his friends and his clients to tea,
And this is what he told them—— ——
My business is dull, and if this plan too fails,
I’ll go back to my trade—as a splitter of rails,

As the returns came in, to him they were sent,
There was no mistake—he was the next President
Now friends he had plenty, who ne’er knew him before
Who for office and missions did constantly bore.

For weeks and for months he could get no sleep,
For parties called on him, who for office did seek,
He was shook by the hands, until they were sore,
And had now more trouble than he e’er had before.

To New York, the great Gotham did he next wend his way,
With smiles as congenial as flowers in May,
He was feasted and toasted, by Aldermen fine,
And made silly speeches made by drinking wine.

From thence to Philadelphia, then in Harrisburg he appeared,
And to pass through Baltimore he was not afraid
So in a Scotch cap, and a terrible fright,
He passed on through Baltimore in the dead hour of night.

What has passed since that time you all well do know,
The country’s near ruined and a very bad show,
Of settling the question—and only by fight
Will peace be proclaimed and then we are right.

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